


finding panacea

by miracleboysatori



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Blood and Gore, Explicit Language, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-23
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2019-01-04 12:25:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12168843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miracleboysatori/pseuds/miracleboysatori
Summary: pan·a·ce·a / ˌpanəˈsēə/noun, a solution or remedy for all difficulties or diseases.





	finding panacea

**Author's Note:**

> (this was originally going to be a fic I was writing for hqbb this year, but for many reasons I needed to drop out)
> 
> I've wanted to write a Post-Apocalypse AU Shiratorizawa fic for a long time now, and I'm so excited to finally be sharing it with the fandom! Updates may be a bit slow, especially since I still have IAHWNW and Gecko fic to finish as well. I also have many other fic plans in the works, so please stick around if you like Shiratorizawa!
> 
> Thank you to my incredible beta and best friend, [Erica](http://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverAmoebasquid/pseuds/SilverAmoebasquid)!  
> Thank you also to [Kurii](https://twitter.com/rocking_socks), who signed on to be my artist! I apologize again for dropping, I'm just thankful someone was interested in my fic ;;
> 
> And thank you to anyone who's giving this a chance! If you're a frequent reader of my stuff, I apologize for being so absent and rarely responding to comments. I've had a very difficult year and I'm trying to pull out of it, but please know that your support/comments/kudos mean everything to me and keep me going <3 I'm not primarily a writer (art is my main thing) but the comments I get always make me feel so thankful that I got into writing as a hobby.
> 
> (also... this Tendou is VERY different from the usual Tendou I write but he'll soften up soon enough c; ik rn he's a bit... ooc )

It doesn’t matter how many countless mornings he’s woken up on this godforsaken planet, Tendou Satori consistently finds himself immediately struck by a single, vague question: why?

Exactly what that means depends on the day. It depends on his mood which is usually foul to begin with. Sometimes he’s questioning why the night was seemingly extra cold, or why his stomach is growling when he clearly had a fair amount of food the day before, and sometimes, well…

He cracks his eyes open, slowly and painstakingly, before immediately shielding his stare from the intense, brutally hot sun hanging above him. The sand underneath him isn’t much better. Generally his group and him would find someplace indoors, or at least a flat, hard ground to rest on overnight. Lately, however, the moments were few and far between when they would be filled with hope as they laid their eyes on the sight of hazy outlines of cities on the horizon. It’s been scorching desert for miles, days, possibly even weeks. He can’t keep track anymore.

So yes, this morning the single word on his mind - “why” - definitely has to do with the uncomfortable surface beneath him, it definitely relates to the insufferable heat, but there’s one clear trigger for this word. One huge question that plagues his mind constantly.

Why did the world go to shit?

It’s a question he’ll never know the answer to. His _parents_ didn’t even know. Or maybe they did. Either way, they’re dead and gone now, so it doesn’t matter. Tendou doesn’t like to dwell on the past; it’s a waste of time and a waste of energy.

So, as he does most mornings, Tendou shoves the question out of his mind. The only question that should be on his mind is where he needs to go next. What he needs to do in order to keep surviving. Finally feeling enough energy, he sits up, still shielding his eyes from the sun. He glances around, noticing that, thankfully, his bags and supplies are still right next to him. He checks next for his two companions, and breathes a sigh of relief when he finds both of them not far away, talking in hushed tones while packing up their things.

Tendou met Semi Eita and Yamagata Hayato years ago, practically grew up with them. He supposes they’d be considered something like ‘childhood friends’, if any of them had even been given a childhood. They were all a part of a much larger group, the same group Tendou’s parents had been a part of. As the years went by, the group gradually grew smaller. People died, ran off, some were even banished from the group. And now all that remain are these three.

Semi isn’t a doctor by any means, but he knows how to patch up wounds and what medicine to look for when they scavenge cities. He’s sharp and fiercely caring, almost to a point where it annoys Tendou. But the number of times Semi’s saved his ass through the years is too high to count, and for that he’s incredibly thankful.

Yamagata is a different beast. He’s loud and excitable and oftentimes Tendou wonders how he can remain so optimistic given the situation. But he’s loyal and would do anything for the group. Not only that, he’s also impressive with firearms, and Tendou hasn’t met another person who’s more accurate with a sniper than Yamagata is. 

“You guys didn’t wake me up,” Tendou grumbles, just loud enough for both them to hear, “what gives?”

“You needed sleep,” Semi answers simply before slinging his bag, packed with medical gear, across his shoulder.

“Fuck that,” Tendou furrows his brow, standing up and swiping at his legs to get rid of some of the sand, “we could’ve left earlier if you’d woken me up.”

“Fair point,” Semi runs a hand through his silver hair before tugging the headband around his head tighter, “but I’d rather leave later than have to haul your exhausted ass through a city or listen to you bitch about being tired.”

Tendou doesn’t fight that. So maybe he’s not the best at getting enough sleep. And really, it wouldn’t be the first time Semi’s had to piggyback him for miles. So for just this morning, he supposes leaving later isn’t a huge crime.

“‘City’,” Tendou scoffs, folding his arms across his chest while staring off into the distance, an expansive desert, “yeah, right. I wouldn’t count on it.”

“Not with that attitude!” Yamagata pipes up, a wide smile crossing his face as he slings a massive sniper across his back.

Tendou dramatically flourishes his hand in the direction they’ll be headed, “Lead the way, captain optimism.”

In response, Yamagata gives a salute with a single middle finger and quirks his lips upwards in a smirk before leading the group forward.

To strangers, this banter may be crude, but Tendou is used to it. All three of them are used to it. In an odd way, it almost makes Tendou feel at peace. Like there’s one constant in his otherwise unpredictable existence, and that’s that he has his two best friends next to him. They’re here, they give him shit, he dishes it right back and he’s thankful for that. At the end of the day, he knows either of them would do anything for him, and he returns that sentiment.

Besides, they work incredibly well together. While Semi is great at strategizing and patching the other two up, Yamagata watches like a hawk, immediately sensing danger when it’s nearby and quickly and effectively reacting to it. Tendou’s skills are different; he’s okay with firearms and weapons and he’s only slightly knowledgeable about medical things, but he’s fast, stealthy, cunning, and can scavenge a building quicker than most people he knows (though, to be fair, that’s not many people.)

They head off, Yamagata leading the way and the other two trailing closely behind. Tendou isn’t sure which direction they’re going in. He can’t be bothered to know, it’s not like it really matters. As long as wherever they’re headed has buildings to scavenge and ground to sleep on. They’ve been keeping up this same routine of migrating and walking for hours almost every single day but he’s still not used to it. His body isn’t used to it. He wasn’t graced with the same musculature as Yamagata, and _definitely_ not the same patience as Semi. 

Somehow, the seconds turn into minutes and the minutes into hours. Tendou mostly keeps his eyes trained on the sand beneath his feet. It’s not the most pleasant view but it definitely beats the bright sun. He hasn’t kept track of time in years, so he doesn’t bother wondering what time it is beyond ‘sunrise’ and ‘sunset’, ‘night’ and ‘day’.

By the time the sun is probably a couple hours from setting, Tendou’s eyes are starting to get heavy and his ankles feel like they might snap in half at any moment. This alone is enough to annoy him but when Semi stops abruptly in front of him, causing Tendou to nearly slam into his back, he whips his head up and almost asks what’s going on.

But then he sees what his companions are seeing - the faint outline of a few buildings several miles away. 

“There,” Yamagata pulls the binoculars hanging around his neck up to his eyes, “finally. I _told_ you, Satori!”

Tendou can practically hear the grin on his friend's face and he can’t help smiling too. This is the first sign of _anything_ that they’ve seen in so long.

“Yeah, yeah,” he teases, “but how far is it?”

“Another hour maybe?” Yamagata drops the binoculars, letting them thump against his chest before turning around to face his friends, “If we walk faster than usual we might beat the sunset, let’s hurry!”

“I feel shitty and my legs are about to give out,” Semi quickly responds, “but I’d rather sleep somewhere other than the desert again.”

Tendou agrees, giving an enthusiastic nod.

Clearly in a similar mindset, all three begin walking quickly towards the faint city in the distance. As difficult as running in the sand can be, sheer willpower alone pushes the three of them at an even quicker pace. Desert gives way to dirt and rocks which eventually give way to sporadic buildings partially crushed to rubble, and by the time they reach what was once just an outline in the distance, the sun has begun to set, casting an eerie warm glow throughout the empty and ruined streets.

Now standing in one of the deserted streets, Tendou looks around, making a slow circle and taking in all the buildings surrounding him. This must have been a fairly populated area before shit went down. Empty apartment complexes, large shopping centers, and huge banks surround the three of them. A familiar itch rises up beneath Tendou’s skin. An itch to explore and scavenge and really _discover_ just what this city can offer him. What little secrets he can find in so many little nooks and crannies.

“Satori,” Yamagata’s voice has a hint of concern, “I see that look on your face. We aren’t doing that tonight, we need sleep.”

Interrupted from his blissful train of thought, Tendou turns to his comrade and smirks, “C’mon Hayato, it’s been so long since I’ve gotten to _explore_.”

“No,” Semi states firmly, “I’m not about to let you run into unknown territory, in the _dark_ no less. You’ll end up hurt and then we’ll just be stuck even longer.”

“Have more faith in me, Eita,” the redhead mocks offense, “besides, don’t you guys want a good meal? I might find something really good. I have those _special senses_ ,” he wiggles his eyebrows.

Yamagata and Semi exchange concerned glances, then look back at Tendou with defeat.

“Alright, but wherever you end up going, me and Eita are sticking close behind and setting up camp nearby,” Yamagata folds his arms, raising an eyebrow.

“Also,” Semi interjects, “you better be finished within an hour. Otherwise I’ll consider you dead and I’m going to eat your share of dinner.”

“Damn, alright,” Tendou laughs softly, nervously, “thanks for the _permission_ , mom and dad.”

Tendou usually doesn’t have a system for scavenging. Well, not beyond getting through buildings quickly and efficiently, leaving no stone unturned. But with rules now set in place by his group tonight, he’s given the option to choose one building, and _only_ one building. He could fight this rule, but Semi’s wrath is not something to toy with, especially this late.

They walk for several minutes down an increasingly darkening street, Semi’s short comments constantly reminding Tendou that it’s getting late and he needs to pick a place quick so they can finally sit down. But Tendou doesn’t want to pick just any building, he’s wants to choose one that speaks to him, gives him the feeling that he’ll find a lot inside.

Finally, after what feels like ages of Semi’s snappy comments and Yamagata’s hushed laughter at his friend’s annoyance, Tendou stops in front of a fairly small building. It looks like it was once a convenience store, stuck between two larger buildings, probably both restaurants judging by the faint and peeling stickers advertising special lunch deals. 

He points at the building and turns back to his friends, “This one. It’s small, not noticeable at all. The door is even still shut, that’s not typical.”

“Doesn’t that sort of give you weird vibes, though?” Semi asks, cautiously looking around, “Everywhere else around here was clearly scavenged,” he gestures towards the surrounding buildings, “all those doors are open. This one seems… strangely clean and untouched.”

Tendou ponders this. Semi isn’t wrong, he usually isn’t. But Tendou’s urges are strong right now, his instincts are alive and kicking and he wants nothing more than to slip inside and feel the rush of exploring a tight, small area again. It’s been so long. He doesn’t care how sketchy this seems.

“It’ll be fine,” he finally answers, waving a hand in Semi’s direction, “just set up camp nearby and I’ll yell if anything comes up,” he then extends a hand in Yamagata’s direction, wordlessly requesting one of the several bags they typically use for scavenging.

Hesitantly, Yamagata slips off the bag he has slung around his back, unzipping it and pulling out a dirty, ripped up backpack. He hands it to Tendou, giving Semi an apologetic look. Semi simply rolls his eyes in defeat,

“Flashlight in here?” Tendou asks, carefully unzipping the backpack.

“Yeah,” Yamagata nods, “but don’t use it too much. We’re running out of batteries really quickly. Even better, try to find some while you’re in there.”

Tendou gives another one of his half-hearted salutes before grabbing the old flashlight and clicking it on and off. As is custom for anytime he’s about to do anything even slightly reckless, he offers each of his friends a smile, a wave, and a soft, confident, “I’ll be back.”

Of course he’ll be back. He’s never once lied about that. Tendou doesn’t have any fear when he scavenges like this, even if it _is_ in pitch black, or in a city he’s never once stepped foot in. If anyone has any doubts it’s his friends. But even then, as he begins ascending the stairs to the quaint convenience store, he looks back and finds that they’re already cautiously slipping inside a small parking garage on the opposite side of the street.

He’ll be fine. And his friends know this too.

Slowly and cautiously, Tendou reaches for the old, rusting doorknob on the front door. He glances at the rotting wood sign somehow still nailed to the door, reading “CONVENIENCE STORE”. He gently pushes the door open, immediately hearing a bell tinkling above his head.

Odd. Something like this isn’t exactly unheard of, but it’s also somehow a bit unnerving. He vaguely wonders if this bell still serves the same purpose it did when this still acted as a store. A sort of trigger, to let someone know that someone is coming inside.Surely not. 

_Definitely not_. Tendou thinks as soon as he’s stepped foot inside and turned on his flashlight. The shelves aren’t stocked but they look untouched, as if no one had pushed their way through this door and searched desperately to find supplies. As if, somehow, no one had ever even _discovered_ this one little building. The interior is extremely dusty, but it looks untouched besides the usual signs of years of no activity. 

He walks forwards, carefully, swiping two fingers along one of the shelves along his way. He’s come across cases like this before, small family owned stores whose owners thought to pack away all their stock in a back room somewhere in hopes that whatever happened to the world would end quickly. 

Obviously, that was not the case.

Tendou vaguely remembers coming across a store extremely similar to this one a long time ago. The shelves were empty there too, but when another member of his group found the storage key in the back office of the shop, they were rewarded with a treasure trove of supplies. A treasure trove that lasted them _weeks_. He hopes, desperately, that that can be the case here too.

Shining his flashlight in various directions of the store, he finally finds a hallway towards the back that he assumes could lead him to the office. Stepping over glass from a few exploded windows, he peeks around the corner, and is greeted by a extremely dark, tight hallway. 

Creepy.

Slightly shivering, which he tells himself is from the cold, he moves forward, taking careful steps and using his flashlight to see what lies on either side of him. Several newspaper articles carefully mounted in picture frames, even more photos of a smiling, happy family. He assumes these must be the people who were running this place. He tries not to think too hard about where those people might be now, and how they might feel about him digging around in their store.

Thoughts like that still push their way into his head sometimes. He knows they’re a waste of time. He knows feelings like this don’t matter anymore. He doesn’t want to feel things like guilt. All he wants is to survive. 

Tendou shakes his head, attempting to rid himself of the guilty thoughts. Finally he comes across a door, labeled with a metal plate and fancy type that reads “Staff Only”. He tries the knob, finding that with a fairly strong push, it easily swings open. Inside is, yet again, dust-coated furniture and walls decorated neatly with photos and newspaper articles. Well, most of the walls, anyway.

Turning to his left, Tendou finds that the corner of the office is completely blown out. The brick wall is falling apart on either side, and he can clearly see right outside, can easily feel the cool breeze rushing inside.

That’s disheartening, to say the least. 

Immediately feeling defeated, Tendou leans against the wall next to the door he just entered. With the wall blown out like that, this could mean that someone has already been through this entire building. They could’ve entered from this literal hole in the wall instead of the front door. This could’ve happened years ago, or even months. Tendou has no idea. All he knows is that he probably isn’t going to go back to his friends with a bag full of supplies, like he had planned.

Dragging his hands down his face, Tendou takes a moment to think. He supposes trying to look for a key anyway wouldn’t be a bad idea. He’s experienced and smart and someone else might not have thought of something like that.Tendou stands, feeling the sting of hours of nonstop walking in his legs as he walks towards the desk in the opposite corner of the hole in the wall. 

It’s an L-shaped desk, sticking out from the wall, flanked by two bar stool chairs. There’s a fancier desk chair behind the desk, Tendou thinks he’ll probably take a moment to rest in that. He’ll do his best not to fall asleep, though, because he feels like he might at any moment and -

He isn’t sure which he registers first, the loud, metallic clamping sound or the surge of white hot pain searing through his ankle. Either way, he’s on the ground in seconds, giving an initial yell of pain before clamping his hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. Tears are starting to form in the corners of his eyes and his leg is twitching and _god_ it burns. He feels warmth and he knows he’s bleeding, he’s bleeding profusely and it’s coating his jeans and his sock and his shoe.

Panic sets in quickly. He shuts his eyes tightly for a moment, pushing out the tears so he can see clearer. When he opens them, he tries to evaluate his situation as best as he can while in excruciating pain. He attempts moving his leg and is only met with an extra sharp surge of pain. He can’t move it much, whatever he stepped into isn’t letting go and he’s stuck. He can’t get away. He wants to yell but he doesn’t want to alert anything or anyone that might be nearby. Clearly this was a trap set by _someone_. And without knowing their real intentions, Tendou is left to simply guess.

He realizes that when he doesn’t move much, the pain isn’t as bad. He sits up straight as best as he can, shifting his body just enough to lean back on the desk behind him. From the moonlight outside, he catches a glint of whatever has him stuck. It’s a bear trap, and a heavy-duty one at that. Now he’s even _more_ certain that whoever set this did not have good intentions. He closes his eyes again, focusing on his breathing and calming himself. If he waits long enough, surely one of his friends would come looking for him, wondering if he’s gotten stuck or hurt. All he has to do is wait, have faith, and somehow sit through this godawful pain.

He groans, but tries to hold the sound back through gritted teeth. He slams his head backwards against the desk, both out of frustration and hope that dispersing the pain will make it more bearable. Tendou quickly regrets that decision afterwards when he realizes it doesn’t have that result and he’s also made a slightly loud noise. He can only hope if it alerts anyone, it’s Semi or Yamagata.

As if things can’t get any worse, after a few seconds, Tendou hears a whooshing sound that he quickly recognizes as a gunshot. He cracks his eyes open just before another bolt of pain sears through his shoulder. 

Now is _absolutely_ the time for panic.

With a lot of pain now in both his ankle and his shoulder, Tendou heaves himself sideways, struggling to move himself out of the view of whoever is now shooting at him through the hole in the wall. He manages to scoot underneath the desk, breath now quick and shallow. Pressing his palm against the fresh wound in his shoulder, he immediately feels the warmth of blood. Great. Now he’s bleeding profusely from two locations on his body.

He guesses everyone has to go at some point in this godforsaken world, Tendou just never expected it to be by the hands of another person.

Mustering all the energy he possible can, Tendou clears his throat before yelling in a pained, urgent voice, “Eita!” he pauses, catching his breath again, and then continues, “Hayato!”

There’s silence for several moments. Tendou almost assumes that his friends didn’t hear him. But, by some sort of luck, he finally hears rushed approaching steps. The door to the office swings open and both his friends come barging in. Semi spots Tendou under the desk and immediately surges forward, dropping down to his knees next to his friend and mumbling a quick, “We heard a gunshot, are you okay?”

Tendou watches Yamagata swing the sniper off of his back, readying the weapon.

“I… don’t know,” Tendou manages, “I came in and wasn’t watching where I was walking and there was a bear trap and then… and then someone shot me. Through that hole in the wall.”

Semi turns his head back, quickly informing Yamagata of the situation, “The gunshot came through that hole. See if you can find them and take them out.”

“On it,” Yamagata mumbles, resting the sniper on the desk before looking through the sight.

“I told you,” Semi grumbles, digging through his medical bag and pulling out an almost completely used up roll of gauze.

“I know, okay,” Tendou sighs before gritting his teeth as Semi attempts pulling the bear trap apart and fails.

“I got him!” Yamagata suddenly calls out, body going completely still as he aims and takes a shot.The sounds rattles the remaining walls of the office, and only when Yamagata lets out his breath and sets his gun down do they all collectively feel relief.

“Who was it?” Tendou demands, even though he knows he’d never recognize whoever it was. They haven’t dealt with people for miles, for months probably.

“Dunno,” Yamagata moves to rest on the other side of Tendou, “doesn’t matter. Are you alright?”

“No, everything hurts.”

“Hayato, help me,” Semi motions towards the trap.

Yamagata studies the trap and chews on his lip, furrowing his brow before muttering, “No dice, Eita. This is a bear trap.”

Semi’s eyes widen with panic. That’s a sight Tendou _definitely_ isn’t used to seeing, and it only drives him further into feelings of doom. He can really feel just how much he’s bleeding now. His vision is starting to go blurry, especially when he glances down and sees the large puddle underneath his leg and the bear trap. He’s a goner for sure.

The last thing he remembers registering is the sound of Semi and Yamagata’s hushed voices, assisting each other in tending to their comrade’s bullet wound. He remembers the ripping of fabric, taping of gauze. He thinks the final straw is the extreme burn of the rubbing alcohol, because after that he completely blacks out.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: [tendouaf](http://www.twitter.com/tendouaf)  
> tumblr: [tendou-satori](http://www.tendou-satori.tumblr.com)  
> art blog: [kat-doodles](http://www.kat-doodles.tumblr.com)


End file.
